This song reminds us of how life must goes on, through the good and hard times. And you, my beloved friends, can be so sure that I will always be there for you.

Hope you enjoy it as much as I do! ♥

May x

Please stop being so cute! You already know how much I wanna spend times with you, and you know that sometimes when I’m with you, I forget about times and everything else. It’s all cos of you. I can’t believe I am late for work again.

Gonna love you less now,

Your loyal sleeper x

Picture from my Singapore trip back in July 2010

It’s not about who you have met in life, it’s about who stay with you till the very end. So go with the flow, learn not to expect anything cos expection always fails & saddens you. Be happy and thankful for people who care and are always there for you, even though they’re not your close friends cos life is not about finding the one but someone who knows all your mistakes & weaknesses, yet still thinks you’re completely amazing. Love you all ♥

-May S. Sittikraisorn

Image disclaimer: I don’t own this image. If you’re the owner of this image and wish not to have this image published, please email me at maysittikraisorn@gmail.com

Like a world traveler,

Been walking all his life,

With no perfect direction to guide,

Nor the right path to walk on.

And throughout those years,

Embraced with pleasurable joy,

Every stop he deployed,

Like a kid with his new toy.

And he’s kept on walking,

Knowing one day he’d stop,

Today is not the day.

When there’re still more things,

He wants to see.

And I wonder,

If he’s ever got lonely,

From walking alone,

With no one beside him,

To share those wonderful thoughts,

On such memorable trips,

They may cherish

Together, now and then.

Maybe someday he realizes,

Happiness is to share.

There’s nothing else to compare,

When you find that someone who cares.

Image disclaimer: I don’t own this image. If you’re the owner of this image and wish not to have this image published, please email me at maysittikraisorn@gmail.com

Love always ♥

Your shopaholic ex girlfriend

Yes I know, saying is easy, doing is hard.

So what am I trying to say here? This is our life and we’re all our own boss. I try to think of life positively as a beautiful thing. It’s short yet meaningful. I have spent so much times in time being so depressed and sad, especially when I was young. As I grow up, I’ve become more mature and learned that I can’t just waste my times feeling like that – it’s not good for my mental health. I’m not saying I have completely get rid of those feeling – of course not – I’m still a human with all feeling.

I, myself, have also been let down lately too, but I didn’t spend time thinking of how bad the situation was for more than a day or two. Somehow, there are always something to wake me up, to remind me how lucky I am to have a life I do.

Here’s what I think….

When you think life is hard, look around and you will see you are living a much better life than million of people and animals out there.

There are so many times in life that I feel so terrible with those homeless people and street dogs. Those people don’t have as much as money as we do, don’t have a nice place to sleep like many of us, don’t have good food to eat, don’t have nice clean clothes to wear and many more.

I think we should feel luckier for having a life we have.

The truth is everyone wants to be loved, wants to be successful, wants to be recognized or even have a lot of money. Sweetheart, I know we all do but the question is do you know where the line of your happiness is.

Family and friends are the most important people in my life and I’m so thankful for having these wonderful people in my life and I know many of you may feel the same way too, right? Then you should feel luckier, because you know what, some people were born not knowing who their parents are; some people spend their whole life trying to find who their real friends are, when you’ve still got your family and friends who you can run to whenever you need them. You just need to make sure you are not gonna let them down. I have both let my friends down and been let down by my friends too. Then, I’ve learned real friends are rare to find and I’ve tried to learn to become less “me” and more “them, cherish everything and every moment we have together. Because you know what, you are who you are today because of these people around you have influenced on you.

Because not everyone has a rich family, we all try to become successful in our career and have as much money as we can. That’s what we all have been taught even since we remember. I always tried to be number 1 in every class in school. Thing’s changed as you grow up. I’ve learned I don’t need to be number 1 in everything, just do what that makes me happy and don’t force myself so much. And when it comes to my career, I’d rather choose to do what I love than what I love less. People have been saying, “Money matters”, it does, but only if you know how to manage it well, you don’t need to have a lot of money.

Everyday, I see homeless people, I see those who have been fired from work and those who are not able to work for money etc and they make me wonder every time, “how the hell do they manage to live off ‘nothing’?” There were times, I thought I was not gonna survive till the end of the month and I did. I guess it’s really all about money management. You don’t need to buy everything you “want” but everything you need, to survive enough. Then, when you have more than ‘enough’, you could also be kind to others, and not just human being but other living things as well. Like for me, I sometimes gave food I bought for myself to homeless people or street dogs because they needed more than me (I’d survive, I have more fat than them you know) and when you see those happy smile on their face, you cant just stop smiling as well.

And if you are single, and looking for love, please never think you’ve got no one to love, cos look around you, there are your friends, family and someone who secretly think that you’re completely amazing (hey I’d like to think so!) I hate hearing my friends go, “Oh you’ll meet that someone blah blah blah” it’s kinda lame but it’s true. I don’t think everyone is going to die alone, unless you choose to be like that. I don’t think you should be sad for not having someone to love now. I mean there are a lot of people whose lovers, husbands, and wives died in a tragic incident. Now that’s even more depressed because their love is forever lost and you can always find new love; you see, you’re luckier than them. So, head up, and let’s hope that there are that someone who secretly think that you’re completely amazing that you have not found yet.

I think it’s really hard to tell your friends who have been recently heartbroken and get themselves up and move on. I still remember the first time I got my heart broken, man it’s been almost a year before I could move on. That’s a thing, everyone has an ability to move on. It’s not that we’re leaving things behind us, but it’s the fact that we can go back in time and change it and we should learn from it and try to move on so the next time we fall in love, we may do it better than before. You don’t need to be stuck with the past and those don’t treat you right, because you know what, everyone deserves to be treated right, right?

There are times I feel super lonely, and those hugs from my friends and family don’t help much lol I’m just saying that being single is not really that bad as we think it is, because it means you’re free to do whatever we want with whomever we want, well for now until we find that someone special (of course!) so we should just enjoy our life as much as possible.

I really think everyone can simply be happy, if they’re only happy for what they have and who they are. Remember to look around before feeling bad about anything in life. I for one believe that if you are able to READ this, you’re luckier than million of people who cant afford to have a computer to access to the internet to read my blog, and probably are not literated like you are.

I just wanna say, you still have more chances to make things better in life, please don’t give up on things easily. Life could always get better if you try to work on it. I am here for you if you need me. Good luck to you all.

This photo is credited to Steve Pepple

“Butterfly Effect”
by May S. Sittikraisorn

She was a cute little girl,

Chasing around one butterfly she found,

How fascinating she thought.

Asked her mama if she could keep

Mama said, Dear little girl

Butterflies are not meant to be caught

Let them fly, fly high to the blue sky

The butterfly overheard and said,

Dear Lil Girl, Life is short,

Don’t waste you times trying to catch me,

‘Cos I will fly, fly away from you,

The lil girl smiled and said, “But I like you”

Little times with you is all I’m asking for,

Know I might cry the sooner you fly away

So can I have a little more times with you?

Just a little more times…

Picture by Emre Ucar

“Life goes on”

by May S. Sittikraisorn

The answer is right in front of me.

How could I have not seen?

Felt like a fool, once was a master,

Lesson learned, yet forgot as times went by,

A question WHY repeated numerously,

Nowhere to run and hide,

Drown in the sea of running tears,

Again and again,

The sun was shining,

Found no light but a cold wind.

As day went by,

Visits from my own nightmares,

Heard the voice saying

It’s time to stop,

Memories meant to remember,

Sweet or Bitter,

Like it or not,

Yes life goes on, and so should you.

Look around and tell me what you see?

The answer is laying in you,

Laying in you…

“A period is like your family. You love to see them sometimes until they start to annoy you and be such a pain in the arse. When they’re going away for too long, you wish they would come back soon or else you’d start to get so worried why they’re not back yet”

- May S. Sittikraisorn

And thats exactly how I’ve alwats felt about my period =P

I still remember the first time I “met” my period. I think I was 11 which was quite early for a girl to have her period. I’m pretty sure I screamed the hell out of me not knowing what happened to me. My first thought was, “Why is there blood on my pants? Is something wrong with me?” My mom calmed me down of course. She had to explain that I was about to be a teenager and how I should react to it. It was a weird feeling that my body was going through some changes. It reminded me of the time when I started to grow my boob. I don’t think men would understand or know about this, but a woman breast would grow on one side first; hence it’s a bit bigger than the other =P

The only thing I hate about having a period is menstrual pain; the worst physical pain a lot of women have to go through all their life. Mine is getting worst as I grow older. I remember taking a lot of pain killers during my university years. I always had to go university ward like every times my period came to visit me. One day, during my last year in the university, one of my friends suggested that I might want to try to take birth control pills to stop the pain. I wondered how it would really work but it actually did. My period came right on times, no more pain, plus my facial skin got even better =) It’s just funny when people started asking me why I looked better and that I had to tell them, “Oh I took the pills, you should try it too”. Their next question would be “But why would you take the pills when you don’t even have a bf or have sex with anyone?” I laughed. Well yeah, I was a virgin but there’s nothing wrong about taking the pills even though you don’t have sex.

Birth control pills to me have been a wonderful miracle  all these years. Yet, there was a side effect as well since each brand has got differet amount of the hormones estrogen and progesterone. In the beginning, my stomachache was gone but it was replaced with a huge headache in the back of my head. I had to consult with a pharmacist so I could finally find the least strong pills for me. No more headache for me yay! It made me realize that each pills really work differently on different persons. I once suggested this birth control pill I was using to my best friend. It worked fine for me but to her, she always felt so sick and threw up so she had to change to use another brand.

Keeping track on taking a pill should be easy for most people. I am, for one, a very forgetful person. It occured to me so many times that I forgot to take a pill and that I had to take 2 of them on the next day, which was not very good for my health. After a while I kinda have to stop taking pills and learn to handle my pain. It grew stronger every times I felt it. The worst pain  in my life so far occured one morning when I was on a company minivan on our way to the office. I was literally hurt so much I actually fainted and passed out. The next thing I knew I was hospitalized as my blood pressure was very low (around 50). I ended up staying in the hospital for a night. My blood pressure came back at 75 again. I just hope I would not have to go thru this again.

So what I’ve done for past few years now, though I sometimes still forgot, is  writing down where I start having my period from the first day to the last day. This really helped me find out that my period is actually always on time, and even more punctual than me! lol So when I noticed that my period is about to come visit me and it had not, I would start to get so worried why it had not.  It’s not like I’m a careless person when it comes to sex; I am very careful about it, but I’ve also learned that condoms only works 98% of the times. There’s 2% chances that you might get pregnant even though you use the condoms! See, this is a funny thing about period; the more you get freaked out or start to get worried, it really likes to play “hide and seek” with you! Frankly, I am not really a fan. I’m sure that most women would feel the same, esp when you’re being more stressful about it,  you could secretly feel that you’re going to have more wrinkles after the game is finished grrrrr

I’d really like to thanks Cosmopolitan magazine and internet for providing me enough sex knowledges I’ve ever needed in life, things I would never learn at school. One thing you should know is that being educated in Thailand, you have no idea about sex education; it’s like a forbidden crime or something. I remember my school did not exactly teach how to wear a condom but give away free condoms. I had never even heard of birth control pills till I was in the university. Seriously, something really needs to be changed here. There’s really nothing wrong for young teenagers to learn about sex. I know that Thai people think sex is not a subject to be discussed or taught in public but I’d have to disagree cos I personally think that even though the kids are forbidden to learn about it in school, they will find it somewhere else anyway. So why don’t we teach them where we can keep them in our eyes, you know what I mean?

Enough with me blah blah blah about my period experience. I know I could go on and on complaining about it really hehe Just imagine if I accidentally got pregnant today, I’d probably be gonna miss my period though. We’ve been going through a lot of hard times together. At least I still survive and we still have walk together for another 20 years for me at least (or less hahaha) I also like to think of those wonderful feeling I could feel if I ever got pregnant, you know, feeling like a mummy and understand what my mum has been through. I think I’d love her even more than I do now! When that day comes, I think I’d probably write about my complaint on being a pregnant woman lol

Specially Thanks to John Gray for writing this great book!